Embarrassing

You keep using that word — I do not think it means what you think it means.

“I don’t want to do that in public! That would be so embarrassing!”

“I don’t want to ask a stranger for help! That would be so embarrassing!”

“Is that my teacher I see in Walmart? I can’t go up to them! That would be so embarrassing!”

So, you stay in your own secluded space, just hoping nobody notices you. After all, it someone noticed you, that would be embarrassing.

One of my favorite Vsause quotes (or ideas) is from his video “The Science of Awkwardness”, starting at the 9:17 mark. He talks about how we often replay certain events in our mind, thinking about how awkward we were at the moment. We think about how other people must have seen us… when in reality they were just as preoccupied about themselves as we were with ourselves. In the end, they probably didn’t even notice.

I word I recently learned encapsulates this concept perfectly: sonder. Simply put, “sonder” is “the awareness that everyone has a story.” Every single person has their own life to think about. You aren’t the main character. (Looking back, “sonder” is actually in the Vsause video too! I guess I’d forgotten after so many years.)

For me, this really takes away most of the pressure when in comes to social anything. Just be confident, and do whatever without stress.

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